Living with Autism

Our 22 year old grandson and his father have been living with us the past year. Our grandson has autism and my hunky hubby and I are learning to live with his special needs. He attends a local program for special adults four days a week where he is taught social skills and work ethics; the fifth day attends an outdoor program designed to introduce these special people to various activities: surfing, hiking, horses, etc. He adores his outdoor activities, a natural for him since his dad is a geologist and they have gone on field explorations together for years.

This past six weeks have been awful for us and even worse for our grandson. He has been alternately irritable, angry, withdrawn vs. his usual sunny and happy disposition. He has limited verbal skills so we are equally limited to interpret the cause of his distress. It becomes the 20 questions or 50 questions or more. Sometimes we find the answer but his intervals are usually short and eventually disappear on their own.

This one did not. He was like a truck without brakes heading downhill. Each day presented a greater challenge. He did NOT want to go to his school, he did NOT want to go to his adventure club, he did NOT want to leave his bed, anything we asked or tried to help with was answered with a loud "NO." One night he was so upset that he started acting out in anger, which we had never seen. I had such a broken heart--obviously he was as unhappy as we had ever seen.

After a long talk amongst the three of us (son, hubby and I) and reading current literature re autistic adults, especially books by Temple Grandin, we wondered if it was time for a medication to soothe his overanxious feelings. The doctor concurred and the med has now been taken for six days. Results? Just too soon to know.

The second action we took was to be sure our grandson was sleeping well at night. He is notorious for waiting till we are all sleeping and then he does what he chooses. Game Boy, IPod, IPad, phone games. We are moving beds this weekend so son and grandson will now be in the same room. And his dad is hiding all game devices each night.

So, this is what we found today in preparing for the move:

28 bottles of water were hidden in various drawers, doors, and cubby holes. Why? We will never know. It is his secret stash. What we do know is how hard we laughed as we pulled them out one by one and how much we dearly love our sweet, mysterious grandson!

If you know any family living with autism, share this story. We all need laughs, especially families who have special needs--don't we all? Love, Jan